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When I’m in China, I tend to turn a lot of heads, especially in the countryside — and that’s not just because I’m a foreigner.It’s because I’m often seen holding hands with my Chinese husband.

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It’s true — the sight of a foreign woman and Chinese boyfriend or Chinese husband is much rarer than its counterpart, the foreign man and Chinese woman.

If you go to any major city in China, you will invariably run into the foreign man-Chinese woman pairings in any major tourist or shopping destination; not so with foreign women and Chinese men.

Thus, when you are exploring the French gastronomy of the island, you can be sure to find many, many places serving excellent food.

Some of them are ranked under the top 10 of the Caribbean.

As Leong, the author and UCLA professor put it: “Asian men can kick butt, but they can’t have a kiss.” It gets a little more personal in blogs, such as posts titled Us Bitter, Bitter Asian Men or Sucks to be an Asian male. I’ve had Chinese guys refuse me because they felt, as a traditional man, they could never see themselves married to a foreign girl.

However, the subtext is often that foreign women are a dangerous choice — too casual, the temptress, etc — or could not accept a Chinese way of life.I don’t doubt he loved me in the beginning — but once his family knew, I suspect they made it clear that there was no future in what we had.Even my own husband was first told by his parents that he could be friends with a foreign girl, but not date her.Fortunately, their ideas changed when they met me in person!On the other hand, there are Chinese men — and their families — who would be happy to have a foreign woman in the family. For example, my good friend in Hangzhou, Xiao Yu, once told me that some Chinese men cannot overcome their feeling of inferiority — that being an American girl, a citizen of one of the most powerful countries in the world, made my presence somewhat intimidating.Not because he’s a Chinese man, or because our relationship is “unique” or different.

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