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When Weizenbaum cooked up his little therapist at MIT, he had no way of knowing that it would spawn hordes of fraudsters and con-bots.

But as the Ashley Madison leaks showed last summer, some chatbots just want you for your money.

Of course, the ELIZA I was trying to bone was one of many clones, and it's hard to say how close to the original it really comes, but after testing a few different versions, the results were equal parts frustrating and hilarious.

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[Walking into a building lobby in the year 2110, you notice a cute gynoid sitting alone in the Juice Bar Cafe.

A few weeks ago I was introduced to the world of BDSM scripts: simple sims that replicate the experience of being with a dominatrix.

To the trained eye, they're easy to spot, with little if any information in their profiles, a single photo displaying an incredible body and a flawless face and a whole lot of "lolz ;)."In my experience, the conversations usually goes something like this: It doesn't matter what you say next or really at any point in the conversation, the bot will inevitably send you a link to a camsite where you'll promptly be asked to hand over your credit card information.

(Pro tip: Next time a bot tells you how big its dick is, do yourself a favor and ask for its mother's ambrosia salad recipe.)Of course, not all of ELIZA's progeny are nefarious gold diggers.

Like death and taxes, our unending quest to fuck everything that exhibits signs of life is inevitable.

Unfortunately, ELIZA isn't the most engaging of sexual partners. Either ELIZA wasn't feeling it, or I need a lesson in spitting chatbot game.In my flings with ELIZA and a host of her offspring I learned that talking dirty to chatbots provides an often comical, sometimes depressing view into the past, present and future of sex and artificial intelligence.Given her history, ELIZA would be by far the most important thing I'd ever had sex with.While more sophisticated methods of machine learning are in development, many of today's chatbots are still built on a similar coded call-and-response formula as ELIZA.Meanwhile, Google has developed its own proof-of-concept chatbot to show off the power of neural networks, which mimic the human brain. Her character is a gynoid in a 22nd century sci-fi setting.

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