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"To put it simply, the breakup sucked," Olivia says.But it gave her enough space to help her see her self-worth and focus on her education.Simple adjustments to my online dating profiles opened the gate for messages from couples—and a rush of options.

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Imagine that you'd put them in a closet for a while and you took them back out and they made your ass look fantastic," Lucy says.

He was sweet and inquisitive, and she was funny and a little shy.

Dating the second time around works for couples when partners become different people than they were at the onset of the relationship, while still retaining all of the attractive qualities that first drove their partner to them. A 2005 , take a lot of time but usually endure once they're formed.

The most successful rekindled relationships benefit from the built-in intimacy of the previous relationship, a kind of comfort you want to keep returning to."Imagine if you had a pair of pants that you really loved but they were your comfy jeans.

The key might be personal growth: Our younger years are full of on-and-off relationships, or what researchers call "relationship churning," due to the uncertainty that comes with that time in life.

For those like Lucy who decide to the reconnect through the churn, the success of the second-time relationship often reflects how much each partner has grown.The first time happened when Jaya was 16 and Matt was 17.During their five-year break, they kept in touch, developing the kind of friendship where "you immediately call when you've been dumped by someone else, or when your grandpa dies, or when you see something that reminds you of them," Jaya tells .Without the time apart and the people they dated in between, Lucy says they would have never been able to connect meaningfully the second time around.from the Journal of Adolescent Research found that 44% of young adults ages 17 to 24 have gotten back together with an ex in the last two years.That friendship remains crucial even once a couple finally settles down together.

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