Dating a serial cheater boundary issues dating

There’s really no end to what humans will do to avoid discomfort or pain.Most of us consider wealth to be a key component of happiness, and many of us can only understand “wealth” as “an accumulation of resources.” The more stuff you have, the happier you’ll be, right?The one deterrent and only reason my professor did not take the opportunity was because he knew his coworker had been having an ongoing affair for several years.

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It’s not that I think I’m ultra-qualified to tell people how to live—it’s just that I’ve made a lot of mistakes in 27 years, and I can’t help but wonder if sharing my experiences will help other people avoid some fairly major bumps and bruises along the way.***I cheat on everyone I date and love. I was never very good at having affairs; I constantly got caught, bringing on an Oscar-worthy performance of hysterical tears and apologies. My victim would eventually get fed up and bounce, but as I couldn’t stand being alone, I’d quickly move on to the next.

Still, I hated the way it made me feel, and much more than that, I couldn’t live with what I was doing to other people.

Another important facet of this situation to note is that serial cheaters often justify the act of cheating in questionable ways.

For instance, in an anonymous New York magazine article, “Confessions of a Serial Cheater (Who’s About To Get Married),” the serial cheater explained cheating ultimately “helps” his relationship because it allows him to appreciate his significant other more.

To some, it seems absolutely ludicrous cheating would in any shape or form “help a relationship.”While I neither condone infidelity nor encourage it, it's important to understand every story has two or more sides.

In the instance of cheating, the cheater’s point of view is one of them.

The consequences felt minor most of the time—after all, I’d tell myself, I had needs.

I wasn’t happy in my relationship, so I’d seek out temporary balms that would work for a minute, eventually leading to yet more sadness.

If I felt they weren’t paying me enough attention, I would find someone who would be nice to me for a few hours, a couple of days a week.

It was so much easier to go out in search of instant gratification than it would have been to stay home and work on what I had.

He made it crystal clear cheating would result in an F, no exceptions. A close coworker had decided to branch off and form his own business.

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